Author: Pappa on Leave

Day 29: Moving

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I mentioned earlier that we are moving, and yesterday was the big day.  This was a big process, involving me staying home and finishing up with the final packing and staying with the movers, and my wife taking the little guy to the new place and doing the walk thru and making sure everything was ready to go.

I’ve moved so many times in my life, it’s now just an annoying thing I have to do occasionally – like doing your taxes (for Swedish readers doing taxes in America is crazy complicated compared to the nice system in Sweden).

How do you move in Hong Kong?  I have never used a mover, but getting a truck and driving everything would be absolutely horrible with the left side of the street driving, small streets, and chaotic drivers here, and the cost would probably be cheaper to just get a mover.  So for us, the best way to do it is to get a mover.  They came to see our place and gave us a quote, then dropped off some boxes to pack.  You can also get movers where they pack your stuff for you, but this option was cheaper and we didn’t mind.  Then they come and get everything, take it to the new place, and bring it in and reassemble anything needed.

The guys we used were super efficient, it was clearly not the first time they have done this – packing up the apartment started at 14:30 and they left the new apartment 17:00.  The majority of the time was in the actual transport of the goods from the old apartment to the new one.  During the process I actually just tried to stay out of the way – kind of like when my wife was giving birth and all the doctors and midwives were running around (more on that in a future post).

packed up and ready to go

We will receive other things we bought (from stockroom and ikea, for example) later this week, and the apartment will slowly feel like home every day.  It’s bigger and hopefully it is just be right size for our family.  We are excited to be in a place with clean air, quieter streets, and a bit more “tranquil” vibe.  Last night we for a walk and went to dinner at a German chain called Berliner and it already felt like we were miles away from our previous apartment, where we were basically in the middle of everything from the time we walked out the door.  Our happiness when we were walking in the new neighborhood, where we could breathe and talk and enjoy the air was a cool thing to experience.  It will be a little longer commute for my wife to/from work, but it’s all about the little guy (and us) being in a more healthy environment instead of all urban.  I hope he (and we) enjoy it in a discovery bay!

the old neighborhood
the old neighborhood
the new neighborhood
the new neighborhood

Day 28: Working out in the Park Hong Kong Style

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On those morning walks I like to take with the little guy through the parks, when it is early (for Hong Kong, 8:00 is early) and the city is just “waking up”, you would think the parks would be empty, right?  Nope.  They are packed with people (mainly retired people), and most of them are exercising. 

 The word “exercise” should be used loosely here, but basically I think anything you do to stay active is good, especially when you get older.  The activity I have seen in the parks ranges from Tai Chi and Badminton to walking while clapping hands or slapping their arms, faces, and legs.  The clapping and the slapping are the hardest to get used to, especially if you are on a skype call with your friends or family in the USA. 

I took a video to show the people gathering in the park to work out – you can see it does not really qualify as “working out” by American or Swedish standards, but it definitely fits the definition here.  Unfortunately you can’t hear the music with the video, but you can probably imagine it.

lots of people “working out”

Day 27: Flower Market

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I was tasked this week by my wife to go to the Flower Market and buy some sticks for Easter.  For those of you who are not Swedish, the way they do their decorations for Easter in Sweden is this:

  1. take some sticks (probably birch)
  2. paint those sticks white (optional)
  3. put some feathers on the sticks (could be something else, too)
  4. put the bunch in a vase

The end result is an Easter decoration (called a “Påsk Ris”)

Påsk Ris - image from http://annasvarld.vimedbarn.se/category/pyssel/
A nice Påsk Ris – image from http://annasvarld.vimedbarn.se/category/pyssel/

So, my wife thought it would be good if me and the little guy went to the Flower Market to find the sticks for us to make one for Easter.  (I think she just wanted me and him to have a project, to which I am thankful).

The Flower Market is basically a street with flower and plant shops on it.  I have mentioned before that there are various “districts“, and this would be one of those districts – the “flower district” – it is not far from where Nathan Road splits, just above Prince Edward Road.

one of the more popular stands selling all sorts of tropical plants
one of the more popular stands selling tropical plants

At this market, we found tons of great plants, flowers, and other wonderful things to add some green to your home.  I was dreaming of getting some of these crazy orchids I saw, but realized that orchids are difficult to care for (at least for me, anyway), and I have a baby to focus on. 😉

this old guy just sat there looking bored with an unlit cigarette in his mouth for most of the time I was there, until he finally lit it and smoked it like an old Chinese James Dean. The orchids he has are unbelievably beautiful - especially the one right in front of him.
this old guy just sat there looking bored with an unlit cigarette in his mouth for most of the time I was there, until he finally lit it and smoked it, looking kind of like Clint Eastwood. The orchids he has are unbelievably beautiful – especially the one right in front of him.

So, me and the little guy walked around the market looking for the appropriate sticks for this Påsk Ris, and trying not to be impressed by all the amazing flowers.  Not surprisingly, at a place called the “flower market”, they primarily sell living green leafy things and flowers, so we were not able to find anything.  Maybe we will use bamboo for this year’s decorations 😉

Day 26: Charcoal Toothpaste

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Last night at the supermarket I bought “Charcoal Deep Clean” toothpaste, made by Colgate.  I couldn’t resist.  Charcoal is basically the best natural ingredient for removing odor and pulling out impurities, and I already use Charcoal deodorant, and Charcoal face wash, so why not charcoal toothpaste, too?

On the box it claims it deals with cavities, plaque, gum care, sensitivity, tartar, enamel, staining, and bad breath.  Is there anything this toothpaste doesn’t do?!

So, what’s it like?  It is a great toothpaste, but who knows if that has anything to do with the charcoal, or if it is the super minty flavor.  All I know is it is better than the German Colgate we had, which is so bad I figure it must have been found at an old factory in East Germany and they decided to sell it anyway – and then my wife bought it.

Next step: charcoal toothbrush and charcoal cotton swabs.

Day 25: Baby Development and a Parent’s Unavoidable Worry

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Today I was playing with the little guy and it became clear to me that he is less interested in grabbing at objects now.  As I sat there I started to question myself, to ask if I have been doing something wrong – and now he will never grab anything with the dexterity he needs.   Surely by now, 4,5 months, he should be able to pick up things like an adult, right?  My mind was spinning.

I remembered something I have been reading in virtually every resource: every child develops differently, and sometimes it is ahead of the curve (like the little guy sitting up and grabbing things at 3,5 months, his current verbal recognition, and his overall awareness), sometimes it is behind, and sometimes it goes on a “plateau” before advancing (like his current grabbing and sitting up without help).  And as every parent hopes for, sometimes it is right on track – like his current progress towards crawling and love of some books.

So after this little self-reminder, I was able to stop, put things into perspective and allow myself to breath.  After all, these things are a roller coaster of constant change.  Of course there is always the potential that this afternoon he just didn’t feel like grabbing anything I put in front of him, so maybe I freaked out for no reason.  After all, he certainly has no problem grabbing my wife and my clothes and hair, and the book when I read to him, and so on.  So maybe I just need to relax and quit worrying (is that possible?) 😉

Day 24: Music and the Baby

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Everywhere you read about pre-birth and post-birth development of a child, it says to inundate your little one with music.  Music towards the belly, music in the crib, music during the day, and so on.  We have loosely followed this advice – and as I learned last week, clearly there are some kind of mental connections that are made to music that is introduced early on.

Since going on Pappa Leave, it has been important to me not to have the television on (and in Hong Kong, we don’t have many options anyway).  Apparently, in studies they have found that when the television is on a lot, even as background noise, down the road there is a higher instance of that child having a hard time focusing.  There will probably be tons of ways to diminish his ability to focus, so I figure if I can control this one factor, it is a good idea.

From a practical perspective, it would be easier to have the television on – our little guy is super visual, and he loves to watch anything on a screen.  But, I made the call that when we are at home during the day, the tv stays off, and we stay engaged with one another.  If I am doing any “house things”, I am talking with him while doing them and he plays, and otherwise we are playing, reading, and doing things like tummy time or helping him get more confident on things like sitting up.  To make listening to music a part of the way we operate is both good for him, but also good for me so I don’t feel super isolated.

The little guy has not really shown much interest in music since birth (again aside from 1 song).  As a visual guy, the thing that would calm him down during those first few months where he was not super calm was not a song, or music, but looking at bright light or a contrast in colors.  He does like “city noise” – we have an app that we used to use that has a lot of sounds, and one is the sound of a city.  This is fortunate being in a place like Hong Kong, where that noise is literally music to his ears.

Anyway, as music is so important for his development, I have been experimenting with playing him different types – jazz, classical, alternative, rock.  He seems to be into fairly upbeat music – for example he likes Jason Mraz, Dave Matthews, and some U2 (not the new album), but not the Cranberries.  He is not huge into classical music overall, but he does like piano.  As one of the small handful of people who is still not into Spotify, today I turned on the iTunes “radio” feature and played “80s hits”.  This, the little guy loved.  Normally he is not too happy in his bouncer for more than 15 minutes, but today he was jammin’ to the 80’s, and all the synthesizer sounds that are involved in 80’s music for a while longer.  There were 2 exceptions: he did not seem too pumped by Madonna, and there is 1 musician he really did not like: Michael Jackson.  I guess he’s more musically evolved than I thought 😉

Day 23: Electronics and a New Bag

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Today the little guy and I had a few missions: 1) shop for a microwave and a toaster oven (there is no oven or microwave at our new place), and 2) find a passport holder for his 2 passports.

Fortunately, my wife works at Lai Chi Kok, which is one stop on the red line from Sham Shui Po, where the best electronics market is (and I assumed that meant a good place to go for appliances, too).  So, after lunch in the park, with the little guy strapped into the Baby Björn, it was time to go shopping.  We walked over on some side streets and I found some random markets and cool places and I want to go back to (one place is a restaurant called “A Little Bit“).

Along the way, we stopped at McDonald’s and I had a Green Tea Ice Cream Cone, and then noticed next door was a shop selling outdoor gear at really good prices.  I quickly concluded they must be well-done knockoffs – for example a Haglöfs waterproof jacket with taped seams for 150 HKD (about 160 SEK or 19 USD) was a great deal – too good to be true.  I didn’t buy anything but I think visitors might find that place interesting.

We next found our way to an electronics mega store.  Basically they had a massive assortment of iphone cables, external phone batteries (batteries drain quickly in this city, so everyone has an additional external one), and all kinds of accessories – all for prices MUCH lower than they are at the various markets around town, and all in much higher quality, from brands with actual packaging, and so on.  So naturally I bought a few things:

  • iphone cable for 25 HKD (28 sek, 3,25 USD)
  • new ipad case for 35 HKD (40 SEK, 4,25 USD)
  • an external battery for my phone/ipad for 109 HKD (120 SEK, 15 USD)
  • and my favorite weird thing: a multi-usb-tool that looks like a jackknife (see photo) for 25 HKD (28 sek, 3,25 USD).
Look at this marvel of technology: usb to connect to iphone 5/6, old iphone, and mini-usb for non-apple products. Amazing.
A marvel of technology: usb to connect to iphone 5/6, older iphone connection, and mini-usb for non-apple products. Amazing.

The little guy and I left with pure joy in our hearts (actually he slept thru the whole experience, but we would have been pumped, I’m sure).  Could the afternoon get any better?  We ended up at the market looking at baby clothes and found some good options but did not buy anything (my wife is a bit picky about what we put on him, and has already expressed a genuine lack of enthusiasm for the tacky kids clothes at the markets).

After realizing this is not the place to go for appliances, we I started looking for item #2, the passport holder.  After searching at a bunch of stands at the market, as well as shops, it became apparent that there is not a big market for passport holders in Hong Kong.  What I did find, as a lucky byproduct of my search, was a new bag for our stroller or other daytrips (but obviously not to replace the fanny pack).  The one we have is a really nice StorkSak, made of leather, high quality and so on – but it is heavy.  So I wanted one that is lighter and can also be taken off and used if we’d like.

I didn’t want to spend a lot, and it was not a top priority to find one, but if the right thing came around, I would go for it.  And it did.  I found a little shop selling these bags by a brand called Doughnut.  Super cool backpacks and other bags, and then on sale in the corner was the bag we needed.  And it was on sale for only 170 HKD (180 SEK, 20 USD).  It’s a perfect match of everything I am looking for, with good quality, leather straps that will only get cooler looking over time, and much more.  Lots to be excited about with this bag.

look at that beauty. people are going to be so jealous.
look at that beauty. people are going to be so jealous.

Along the way, the little guy kept being charming – talking and having fun with everyone, and therefore we had a great afternoon.  When we got home, it was a little more reading, some playing, some tummy time (he can fully crawl up my chest now!).  Before we knew it, his mom was home and our little family was back together.  We didn’t accomplish either of our missions for the day, but we learned a lot about Sham Shui Po – and we had some fun in the process 🙂

Day 22: Massage and a New Promenade and Park

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Today was a beautiful day with the humidity down and the temperature moderate – what a great day to go to Hong Kong island!  My wife got me the gift of a nice massage at a place in the mid levels called Iyara Prince’s Terrace Day Spa, and I traveled up there and enjoyed an hour massage.  It was a nice experience – the place is clean and nice, it is definitely a bit of an oasis amidst the hustle-and-bustle of Hong Kong.  During the hour it gave me time to reflect and let go – it was nice.

After the massage I met my wife and the little guy down along a promenade called Central and Western District Promenade (what a glamorous name!).  This is a great walk along the water, and it leads to Tamar Park.  It is an easy walk from the IFC mall (with the HUGE Apple Store), and considering how close it is to central Hong Kong, and how nice the weather was, I was surprised it was not busy.  If this were Sweden, there would be groups of people everywhere laying in the grass and soaking up the nice weather like lizards on rocks.  The promenade basically goes right past the big Ferris Wheel between the ferry terminals and the park.

Right behind the tent and the wheel, you find a nice walk along the water and some green
Right behind the tent and the wheel, you find a nice walk along the water and some green

While we sat there at the park, we looked around and noticed a group of 4 guys doing some fancy double-jumping with jump ropes, and a lot of small pods of “helpers” hanging out.  We also noticed behind us in the skyline that there was a big ugly building that looked very different amidst the other buildings – reminding us of the “square and imposing” aesthetic of the government buildings are in Beijing.  This was the area where all those protests were happening in 2014 and early 2015.  We enjoyed the time we were there in the park, imagining the not-too-distant future when the little guy wants to run around the grass 🙂

which one of these buildings looks like China's Goverment building?
Which one of these buildings looks like a government building for China?

Day 21: The Specialness of a Smile and a Restaurant

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Today was a nice day with the family – mainly running various errands around Hong Kong.  This brought us on the metro and by foot to the busy streets all over the big city.  In the process, we had the little guy in the stroller sitting up, in the stroller lying down, in the Baby Björn facing forward, and in the Baby Björn facing the chest.  While in the Baby Björn, he was carried by me and my wife at different times.

He is a resilient little guy, and was genuinely happy all day long – smiling, laughing, giggling, and he was a ray of sunshine everywhere we went.  The feeling of seeing my son, this little 4-month-old smiling amidst all the “ho-hum” people in the city, brightening people’s day as we briefly touch their lives, is not something I can explain with words.  I could say heartwarming, but it’s not enough – it pulls at a deep emotional string inside of me.  His smile is filled with trust, curiosity, joy, and pure unfiltered and unquestionable happiness.  (To be fair, his cry and frown have just as many contradicting raw emotions)

At the end of our day we had a fantastic family dinner at a Japanese Udon restaurant in Olympic Mall.  It was a fantastic meal in every way – good food, nice atmosphere, etc.  Nothing special about the actual restaurant, but I will always have a fond memory of the dinner, because at one point I was caught back at the experience we were having.  We are a little family, eating dinner in a restaurant, and our little guy was just watching, laughing, and babbling talking with us.  We are a little family.  Wow.

To anyone seeing it from the outside, it was probably no big deal – they do not know that we have not eaten in restaurants with our son unless he is sleeping.  But to me, it was a special moment I will cherish in my memory forever.  He will not stay small forever, and he will most likely not always sit with us happily while we eat in a restaurant – but for this 1 moment in time he did, and the feeling of our little family doing this basic thing was extraordinary.

Day 20: Strangers and the Baby

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When you are a guy walking around a big city in Asia, and you and the baby are white, I’ve noticed a few consistent elements to the day.  First is that people will stare at you – especially if they are old (assuming it’s because gender stereotypes are still strong here).  Second, a lot of people like to take a look at the little guy.  If he’s in his stroller, they’ll peek around and stare in, looking at him and then smiling.  If I’m carrying him in the Baby Björn, people are even more interested.

My wife told me that some expats have made a point to cover their babies so the people here don’t “bother them”.  I understand if they are in the stroller, making sure they are unbothered – if sleeping of otherwise needing their personal space, but so far I have not done this more than the sun umbrella (which blocks things pretty well anyway).  But when he is in the Baby Björn, it’s a different story.  When he’s up there, he’s at everyone’s level.  People see him, smile at him, talk to him, and want to touch him.  To all of this I am very open and welcoming – I ask him to reply and to say hello, goodbye (including waving), and to generally talk to people (to which he normally does something cute and endearing).  To those who want to touch him, I keep hold of his hands (which he is constantly chewing on), and they might just do a quick tickle of his arm.

All of this means he interacts with many people everyday – at the supermarket, in shops, on the metro, etc. – something both my wife and I think will be good for his social development, which will benefit him long-term.  If we are in a big city full of people, it would be silly in our opinion to isolate him from that opportunity to get comfortable around other people.  Plus, he enjoys it – flirting with the ladies – smiling, giggling, talking to them.  For him it’s not bad to be a “man on the town”, it’s just too bad he has his old man attached to his back in the process. 😉